Thursday, October 16, 2008

Crusade No. 24

I am back with another one of Michelle Wards GPP Crusades. This one is about your final wishes. I knew I would be participating in this one because I believe in preparing for....well, you know....it's going to happen. It's just a matter of when and no one knows when.

In my family we tend to go pretty quickly. We have kidney disease and with weakened immune systems the weirdest strain of bacteria can take us out....in a heart beat.
So, I have recorded my funeral music. No one wants to talk about it. Not even my husband. But I insist because it's what I want.

My music is great. Have you ever heard Daniel Rodriguez sing Amazing Grace? It's the best and it's on there. The Prayer by Charlotte Church, Time to Say Goodbye by Sarah Brightman and of course Seasons of Love from RENT.
My daughter, Holly said not to put Ave Maria on this disc because it makes her cry. Well, I thought isn't she going to be crying anyway? But I honored her wishes and deleted it, but I have another Ave Maria...yes there's more than one. This one is by Paul Schwartz and is hauntingly beautiful. I did have a funky version by the Opera Babes.
Topping it off with some music from John Rutters Requiem including the singing of the 23rd Psalm.
Yes, you could say I have given some thought to my final wishes. I have the photo picked out should I have a closed casket. The casket decision is up to the family.



As for flowers...I stand with my Mom on this one. She always said she wanted flowers when she was living....not when she dies. Check! Just throw in a few pink roses.
Ashes? I told my husband to turn the ashes into a diamond and make it into a ring. I don't think he would do this for himself. He is not a jewelry guy. But should he go first that is what I intend to do with his ashes and then I can keep him with me forever.

Of course before any of this takes place, my organs will be donated if they can be. And everyone knows this!
One thing that Michelles crusade made me think of that I hadn't before was leaving behind some letters and cards. Maybe cards for my Grandsons' graduations with their savings bonds. Little things like that.

I believe that you really should let your family know in advance what your final wishes are. Maybe if you can't talk to them, then write it all down and put it in a safe place.
Remember....Life is uncertain....eat dessert first!!

And remember that you can live on in someone else by organ and tissue donation. Think green and recycle yourself.

11 comments:

michelle ward said...

Suze - what a terrific post! You are a girl after my own heart - picking your tunes. Love it. You share so many things here and give us much to think about - even if only to sign the donor card. Thank you for being so brave and sharing this with the team and your readers.

Anonymous said...

I did not think of tunes for the wake. I might have to go back an do that! What a gorgeous photo of you! Thank you for sharing your wishes!

Susan said...

I never think about this aspect of the final days, mainly because everyone in my family lives to upper eighty's and ninety's. I want my family to do what feels best for them. I have made no plans and probably will not. I will already be happy and don't want tears, only good memories. It really is something to think about, though. Here are hugs and hopes that you will be around a while longer.

deb musick said...

What a powerful thing to do! I love it. I would have to add Somewhere Over the Rainbow, sung by Israel Kamakawiwo'ole. I am starting by tune list this week! And I will look for those special readings. I am in total agreement with you on the flowers--it was my mother's mantra as well! And I am an organ donor. Thanks for your inspiration.

Wabbit said...

Suze, making a list of tunes is a great idea! I can force my family to listen to John Denver one more time! My tunes would probably be all upbeat. I'm already an organ donor. And I loved that you were able to blog about this with humor.

UMaine Cooperative Extension said...

Wow, you've given this quite some thought and preparation. Really provocative. Now I know what I'll be thinking about during the marathon.

I am thinking of giving my body to a teaching hospital for those yet-to-be-born med students to learn from.

Thanks for this post. Very nice.

Music? I am thinking Brick House by the Commodores. And of course some Johnny Cash.

suze said...

Hey Marc,
I have thought of that too. I hear they keep your body for two years. They would have a field day with this body.
Thanks for the comment.
And thanks also to everyone else.

Everwild said...

After many losses, several of them tied to Cancer, I've come to determine that although death is a sad thing, it's not necessarily a bad thing. Still, it's always the most difficult on those left behind.

Knowing the possibility of *how* (but not when) forces us to recognize (and ultimately accept) our own mortality -- a feat most people shy away from. And, the idea of losing a loved one ... well, it's just easier to avoid because to some degree, talking about it makes it more real and might give it strength.

I told my 2 closest friends years ago that if I died before them and they failed to play Oingo Boingo's "Dead Man's Party" and "No One Lives Forever" in my honor, I'd haunt them forever.

Yes'm, I'm an organ donor, too, though I never thought of it as part of being green. Very cool.

Mescrap said...

Thank you for such great sharing.

girlgonethreadwild said...

INCREDIBLE the way you share Ur life, I'm truly truly amazed and inspired by you!

xo, Monica

Ursula Clamer said...

I is wonderful that you have all of this written down, I am sure it will be much appreciated when needed... but not only that, you've created a Cd - what a great idea! Wishing you a long & wealthy life.